So Money with Farnoosh Torabi · Monday, September 14, 2026
Dr. Marissa Franco explains that changing attachment styles is possible through a process called memory reconsolidation, where returning to a memory can alter its emotional impact. She emphasizes that acknowledging and addressing insecure parts without shame is key to healing.
“Now, in the book, I argue that you actually can change. At least you can change the impact of your past and the way that it's still impacting you.”
“There's a theory called memory reconsolidation, which is which means that every time you return to a memory, you can actually alter the sort of emotional valence of the memory.”
“So we can't shame ourselves for being insecure. I mean, my approach and worth is really all about there's no hierarchy of attachment.”